Learning to trust somebody you met on the internet
29 April, 2008
For many people such as myself, trusting people doesn’t come easily. In general I don’t trust too many people, even at the first level and VERY few at the second level.
I see trust in two levels.
1. Trusting somebody to be what you THINK they are and conduct themselves accordingly.
Example: Lending somebody 50 bux and they promise to pay it back, or maybe lending a tool and believing they will return it. 50 bux or a tool is expendable, it won’t kill you to not get it back.
2. Trusting somebody to be what you KNOW they are and conduct themselves accordingly.
Example: Trusting somebody with your important belongings and possibly your life and the lives of your family.
Wild Rumors -
• Fact - I came on board the Rubicon just about 6 years ago. During that time I have learned a lot of things and taught a few things. I have met a lot of Rubies since then. Some are still members while some aren’t. I have gained a lot of respect for many Rubies.
There are many wild rumors on the net regarding the AlphaRubicon and Rubies. Nothing anybody can say will ever dispel them; however, the Rubicon thrives on Facta Non Verba, Deeds not Words. What are the facts? Here’s a few.
• Fact - Rubiconners like to get together and face to face, go camping, hang out and other normal activities. By doing so we learn more about each other.
• Fact - There are Rubies that I trust with my life and those who trust me with theirs.
• Fact - Just because somebody gets in the door doesn’t mean that they’re automatically trusted. It could take years depending on the person. There are people who’ve been on the boards as long as I have who I’ve never met or spoken to on the phone. Just interactions on the boards. Given their character I can trust them at Level 1.
• Fact - There are Rubies who I trust at Level 2 (and more). I have no problem loaning them anything I own and I completely trust them with my life. There are Rubies who trust me at the same level.
• Fact - There are parents here who trust Rubies with their kids. One parent was talking about his young daughter’s emergency phone number list. After the list was made, they realized that some 95% of it was Rubies. Rubie kids are lucky, they tend to gain lots of adoptive aunts, uncles and cousins.
• Fact - There are people here who will protect other Rubies’ kids and spouses to the extreme, even if that means dying. People who will put themselves between any threat and a VIRP (Very Important Rubie Person) without hesitation.
• Fact - Rubies help each other out. When somebody gets in a tight bind, Rubies step up to the plate and help. We also help each other out on a day to day basis.
• Fact - Occasionally a wolf in sheep’s clothing pops up and is quickly booted out. There is no room for them here.
• Fact - If you are a slacker, dishonest, one who takes and gives nothing back, you aren’t wanted here.
Life as a Rubie -
Being a Rubie is not a part time hobby, it is a way of life, for many of us it is life. I had no idea of the amount of background work that goes on until I got down here. Many people put a lot of time and money into our way of life. Some things never even see the website. Rubies help each other out so much, often-times going way out of the way to do so. The website is nothing compared to the real deal. It merely gives us a place to all stay in communication and share thoughts and ideas and work on survival projects. We walk the walk. We are 100% normal people. We enjoy getting together to celebrate birthdays (celebrated an anniversary at the IC), hang out, shooting at the range, camping, hiking, off roading and everything else we can possibly do.
|Warlord, Kosh and Blackhawk’s combined birthday party|
|Candles wouldn't fit|| ||The food... uff... too much and so good|
I moved to the South in November. Some Rubies have been trying to get me here for years and I finally caved in to the peer pressure. I was told that if I came down I’d be taken care of. I had offers for help moving but only needed one person. The main person who convinced me to come down here is in my Level 2. I trusted what he said to be true and came down. A Rubie drove 2800 miles round trip to give me a hand. I’ve been here a good 3 months, I’m enjoying it and yes, I have been taken care of... maybe a bit too much. Definitely over fed.
More on trust -
• We have hung out several times and spent much time together. By doing so I’ve learned enough to know they are good people and not fakes. I have no doubt in my mind about them.
I mentioned above that it might take years for some people to earn trust or give trust. That’s not always the case. In extreme rare cases there are people who have been on the boards only a few months, BUT blend right in to the cobwebs. They have done so well it seems that they’ve been around 4 times longer. A couple of these people are already at my Level 2. Why?
• It also says a lot when we can be trusted with each other’s kids and significant others. Some people would take the opportunity of being alone with somebody else’s wife or husband as a chance to make a pass or cheat. A real Rubie has enough respect for others and that will not happen. Personally I have been alone with wives, girlfriends and kids with no worries. These same people that trust me, have my trust with my significant other and kids when I have them. It’s a two way street.
• An incident that happened this weekend reinforced trust. A few of us were clearing out a piece of land. While I was cutting wood, Twist996 tapped me and motioned to shut the saw off. I did and asked what was up. He pointed down the mountain where a couple of adults were near a wide and deep ditch and one of the kids had fallen in. He said “They might need a medic, he’s (neighbor) a paramedic but you’re the one I trust.” Fortunately she was fine, just a bruised ego.
• The degree of trust that Rubies have for each other is absolutely incredible. You can’t imagine it until you experience it.
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